{"id":990573,"date":"2023-06-19T21:30:49","date_gmt":"2023-06-19T19:30:49","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/haranta.dusanrybar.sk\/?p=990573"},"modified":"2023-06-19T21:30:49","modified_gmt":"2023-06-19T19:30:49","slug":"chybas-mi-chybam-ti","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/haranta.sk\/en\/chybas-mi-chybam-ti\/","title":{"rendered":"CH\u00ddBA\u0160 MI! CH\u00ddBAM TI?"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

\u010co to hovor\u00ed o n\u00e1s, ak n\u00e1m niekto ch\u00fdba, alebo chceme, aby sme niekomu ch\u00fdbali my?<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Zvykom je, \u017ee ak niekoho milujeme a nie sme s n\u00edm, tak n\u00e1m ch\u00fdba. Ot\u00e1zne je, \u010do n\u00e1m vlastne ch\u00fdba, a pre\u010do? Ak n\u00e1m milovan\u00fd ch\u00fdba, preto\u017ee patr\u00ed k n\u00e1m, dop\u013a\u0148a n\u00e1s a bez neho nie sme celistv\u00ed, tak m\u00e1me probl\u00e9m. Celkovo je tento probl\u00e9m ve\u013emi roz\u0161\u00edren\u00fd. M\u00f4\u017ee za to na\u0161e n\u00edzke sebavedomie, sebahodnota, sebaprijatie a takmer \u017eiadna sebal\u00e1ska. Pokia\u013e to tak m\u00e1me, budeme v\u017edy h\u013eada\u0165 naplnenie pocitov plyn\u00facich z t\u00fdchto cnost\u00ed niekde zvonku. Najlep\u0161ie od n\u00e1\u0161ho partnera. Lebo ke\u010f n\u00e1s miluje, tak za nie\u010do predsa stoj\u00edme. A tak si zrazu zasl\u00fa\u017eime t\u00fa l\u00e1sku a prijatie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Ch\u00fdba\u0161\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Sme z\u00e1visl\u00ed na dop\u013a\u0148an\u00ed pocitov\u2026<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

No pokia\u013e pri n\u00e1s nie je dlh\u0161\u00ed \u010das, za\u010dneme poci\u0165ova\u0165 deficit a ten sp\u00f4sobuje, \u017ee n\u00e1m za\u010dne nie\u010do ch\u00fdba\u0165. Vyhodnot\u00edme to tak, \u017ee je to n\u00e1\u0161 partner, kto n\u00e1m ch\u00fdba. No v skuto\u010dnosti s\u00fa to tie pocity, ktor\u00e9 n\u00e1m ch\u00fdbaj\u00fa a ktor\u00e9 ke\u010f dost\u00e1vame, tak sa c\u00edtime ove\u013ea lep\u0161ie. To neznamen\u00e1, \u017ee doty\u010dn\u00e9ho \u010dloveka nemilujeme. To len znamen\u00e1, \u017ee sme z\u00e1visl\u00ed na dop\u013a\u0148an\u00ed pocitov, ktor\u00e9 n\u00e1m ch\u00fdbaj\u00fa, \u010do vytv\u00e1ra pocit, \u017ee n\u00e1\u0161 partner je na\u0161a druh\u00e1 \u010das\u0165 a bez neho nepre\u017eijeme. V skuto\u010dnosti nem\u00f4\u017eeme by\u0165 \u010falej od pravdy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ke\u010f sa l\u00e1ska men\u00ed na vlastn\u00edctvo a z\u00e1vislos\u0165<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

V momente ako poc\u00edtime, \u017ee bez partnera nem\u00f4\u017eeme \u017ei\u0165, \u017ee je na\u0161ou druhou polovicou, tak sme za\u010dali s ni\u010den\u00edm vz\u0165ahu. L\u00e1ska sa men\u00ed na vlastn\u00edctvo a z\u00e1vislos\u0165. Za\u010dne sa objavova\u0165 mno\u017estvo strachov, po\u010dn\u00fac strachom zo samoty a opustenia, a\u017e po strach, \u017ee bez partnera nepre\u017eijeme. Tieto strachy n\u00e1sobia potrebu vlastni\u0165 a kontrolova\u0165 partnera a ber\u00fa aj posledn\u00e9 zvy\u0161ky slobody z tak\u00e9hoto vz\u0165ahu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jedno z pr\u00e1v, ktor\u00e9 m\u00e1me, ke\u010f pr\u00eddeme na t\u00fato zem, je sloboda. Potrebujeme ju c\u00edti\u0165, potrebujeme ma\u0165 umo\u017enen\u00fa slobodn\u00fa vo\u013ebu<\/a> a aby na\u0161u slobodu ostatn\u00ed re\u0161pektovali. Ak n\u00e1m n\u00e1\u0161 partner za\u010dne bra\u0165 slobodu, prirodzene sa za\u010dneme od neho ods\u00fava\u0165 a odtl\u00e1\u010da\u0165 ho, aby sme si vytvorili aspo\u0148 nejak\u00fd pocit slobody. No \u010d\u00edm viac sa sna\u017e\u00edme uvo\u013eni\u0165, t\u00fdm s\u00fa vy\u0161\u0161ie spom\u00ednan\u00e9 strachy silnej\u0161ie a t\u00fdm n\u00e1s chce e\u0161te viac zviaza\u0165 a pritiahnu\u0165 k sebe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mysl\u00ed\u0161 na m\u0148a, ke\u010f nie sme spolu?<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Za\u010dne pou\u017e\u00edva\u0165 manipul\u00e1ciu, v\u00fd\u010ditky, hrozby, vydieranie a podobn\u00e9 n\u00e1stroje, ktor\u00fdmi sa n\u00e1s sna\u017e\u00ed z\u00edska\u0165 sp\u00e4\u0165 a pri tom nevid\u00ed, \u017ee pr\u00e1ve toto je ten sp\u00f4sob, ako n\u00e1s strati\u0165. Takouto manipul\u00e1ciou<\/a> m\u00f4\u017ee by\u0165 aj \u201eTak ve\u013emi mi ch\u00fdba\u0161. Ch\u00fdbam ti aj ja?\u201c \u201eMysl\u00ed\u0161 na m\u0148a, ke\u010f nie sme spolu?\u201c V podstate n\u00e1m partner hovor\u00ed \u2013 ne\u017ei svoj \u017eivot, mysli len na m\u0148a, lebo ja som to jedin\u00e9, na \u010dom z\u00e1le\u017e\u00ed. A teda, ak nemysl\u00edme neust\u00e1le na partnera, tak by sme sa vlastne mali c\u00edti\u0165 previnilo a za\u010da\u0165 na neho myslie\u0165, lebo \u201etak sa to predsa m\u00e1\u201c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ak povieme partnerovi \u201ech\u00fdba\u0161 mi\u201c, bez potreby sa ho p\u00fdta\u0165, \u010di ch\u00fdbame aj my jemu, a sme t\u00fdm v podstate mysleli, \u017ee sme v poriadku, \u017ee je n\u00e1m dobre a bolo by skvel\u00e9, keby bol pri n\u00e1s. Pre\u010do to teda nekomunikova\u0165<\/a> priamo? Ve\u010f sta\u010d\u00ed poveda\u0165 napr\u00edklad: \u201eSpravilo by mi rados\u0165, keby si bol\/-a pri mne alebo so mnou.\u201c \u201eJe mi super a bolo by skvel\u00e9, keby si si to u\u017eil\/-a so mnou.\u201e T\u00fdm vyjadrujeme, \u017ee n\u00e1\u0161 \u017eivot nie je z\u00e1visl\u00fd na partnerovi a z\u00e1rove\u0148, \u017ee si na neho spomenieme a pote\u0161ilo by n\u00e1s, keby bol pri n\u00e1s.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Pre\u010do n\u00e1m ch\u00fdba?<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

V\u017edy ke\u010f poc\u00edtime, \u017ee n\u00e1m niekto ch\u00fdba a poc\u00edtime potrebu po\u010du\u0165 to ist\u00e9 od partnera, polo\u017eme si nasledovn\u00e9 ot\u00e1zky: Pre\u010do n\u00e1m ch\u00fdba? \u010co je vlastne to, \u010do n\u00e1m skuto\u010dne ch\u00fdba? \u010co n\u00e1m zap\u013a\u0148a? \u010co n\u00e1m nahr\u00e1dza? \u010co je to, bez \u010doho nedok\u00e1\u017eeme \u017ei\u0165 a naplno si u\u017ei\u0165 n\u00e1\u0161 \u017eivot, pokia\u013e tam nie je?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Zdrav\u00fd a vedom\u00fd vz\u0165ah nie je vybudovan\u00fd na z\u00e1vislosti a potrebe, ale na l\u00e1ske a slobode. A\u017e v takom pr\u00edpade m\u00f4\u017ee ten vz\u0165ah narasta\u0165 a paradoxom je, \u017ee a\u017e v takom vz\u0165ahu sa pomaly nechceme pohn\u00fa\u0165 od svojho partnera<\/a>. No nie kv\u00f4li potrebe a z\u00e1vislosti, ale kv\u00f4li tomu pocitu slobody, re\u0161pektu a tomu, \u017ee n\u00e1s prij\u00edma presne tak\u00fdch, ak\u00ed sme a d\u00e1vame si navz\u00e1jom d\u00f4veru a priestor, ktor\u00fd obaja potrebujeme. <\/p>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u010co to hovor\u00ed o n\u00e1s, ak n\u00e1m niekto ch\u00fdba, alebo chceme, aby sme niekomu ch\u00fdbali my? Zvykom je, \u017ee ak niekoho milujeme a nie sme s n\u00edm, tak n\u00e1m ch\u00fdba. Ot\u00e1zne je, \u010do n\u00e1m vlastne ch\u00fdba, a pre\u010do? Ak n\u00e1m milovan\u00fd ch\u00fdba, preto\u017ee patr\u00ed k n\u00e1m, dop\u013a\u0148a n\u00e1s a bez neho nie sme celistv\u00ed, tak m\u00e1me…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":990869,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"pmpro_default_level":"","iawp_total_views":3,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-990573","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-nezaradene","pmpro-has-access"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/haranta.sk\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/990573","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/haranta.sk\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/haranta.sk\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/haranta.sk\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/haranta.sk\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=990573"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/haranta.sk\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/990573\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/haranta.sk\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/990869"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/haranta.sk\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=990573"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/haranta.sk\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=990573"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/haranta.sk\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=990573"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}